Oral History

Aricel, 42

She grew up in Humboldt Park with six siblings, no father, and with her mother caring for all of them. Growing up she did not have a lot, with her mom only making minimum wage cleaning houses. This back then was not a lot considering how many kids she had to take care of at the time. As much as the kids tried to help since they were too young to help she had to make ends meat on her own.
Was it hard on you and your family knowing you could not do a lot of what the other kids were doing?
As a child all you want to do is fit in with the people at your school, so when they would all go to the movies I knew I could not go. I would not even ask my mom because I did not want her to have to worry about me. With my siblings it was every man for himself you had to survive on your own. In the house my siblings would try and act like they care. They would do my hair and act like they wanted to help but as soon as we were out of the house it was like we were siblings again.
Did you ever wonder why your father left?
I did for a while I felt like it was mine and my families fault because he left us for another family with a wife and kids and I just felt like we were not good enough to be his family. As I got older I realized it was not my or my families fault he left on his own no one made him leave he just chose to and it still hurts to this day (she started to get choked up). When he came back to live with us again I hated him for causing my family so much pain, I had to see my mom struggle when he left, one to keep us going and to keep herself going. I had to hear her cry herself to sleep every night and it hurt me so much when she let him back in. To let the man who hurt us so much come back and act like nothing ever happened to act like the time in-between was just some time away from home like a vacation.
How did you react when your father finally came back to live with you and your family?
To my father I had to act like nothing happened because he was the strong tough type that would not take his children acting out of line towards him. Whenever we would go to any of his friend’s houses if they offered us anything we could not take it no matter how hungry we were, we would just have to reject and stay hungry. It was not pleasant having him in the house we were still angry and upset it did not change anything it just took some of the heat off my mother for a while.
What happened as you and your siblings got older?
We started to grow older and got closer because there was nothing blocking us from one another. When we were younger of course we did not like each other we were siblings who likes their siblings when they are young. When we got older we depended on them more and we realized just how much we needed each other and how the bond of blood could never tear.
How were your parents as you got older?
They ended up splitting up which in my opinion was the best thing for my mom. She ended up being fine, I still talk to my father once in a while his birthday, fathers day, and other occasions that called for a phone call. Know that I am older I am so close to my mother we talk about everything and I love her with all my heart. She lives in Chicago as do I and we have never been closer.