Michelle, 19

Michelle is 19 years old. She grew up in Chicago her whole life and had planned to go to Arizona for college. Weeks before leaving some family problems came up and her had to stay in Chicago. She now goes to Northeastern and is trying to adjust to the sudden change of plans.

What has been the hardest struggle you've had to face?
The hardest struggle I think would be right now. There's work which I don’t really like, school which I hate it, and there's my home where I don’t really want to live at anymore. So basically it’s a struggle trying to get out because it seems like there's always something that either pulls me back or it’s the fact that I’m pretty much so unhappy that I’ve given up trying.

Why or how is it that you feel like you're being pulled back to your family?
Well my family is always going to be my number one priority, that’s never going to change but sometimes they just need to realize in order for me to grow they have to allow it to happen.

Do you feel like they're holding you back from succeeding?
Yea sometimes, I know that sounds bad to say that because what parents don’t want you to succeed? But at the same time I always wanted to succeed in my own way.

So do you think they're aware that you feel this way or do they not have a clue?
You know how adults seem to think when they tell us something in goes in one ear and out the other? Well that’s how it seems goes for them. I've told them in different ways and sometimes it just gets so tiring. I feel like its best I just don’t say anything and try to just get out, so basically I don’t think they have any idea.

So you mentioned you hated school, did your parents force you to go or was this your choice?
It wasn’t a choice it’s more like didn’t have a choice. I was set to go to Arizona for school and family problems started to unravel. Technically speaking my parents didn’t force me but at the same time they didn’t stop me from going the school they knew I hated. I had to stay to help my family but if I had a do over I would have waited until the spring semester to reapply to other schools instead of going to NEIU.

So when you said earlier that your parents didn’t stop you from going the school they knew you hated, did u mean NEIU or Arizona?
NEIU, they knew I wanted to go away for college so I could get the experience. I also wanted to gain some back bone. I want to stop relying on my parents and I wish they could stop relying on me.

As being the oldest child, do you feel pressured by your parents to do the best? Or do your brother and sister also feel pressured?
Well I think every parent wants their kids to do their best, but for me I think it’s more of proving others wrong. I’m a very competitive person. I like proving that I’m right or better than what they think. Sometimes I like to prove me wrong it’s like a reverse psychology thing.

The fact that you are a competitive person, do you see that as a positive or negative thing?
Both because I mean I do prove my point most of the time. But at the same time I think I don’t care how I prove my point. I basically do almost whatever it takes to do so which is kind of bad.

What is one thing you've been able to learn from your work experience?
I learned that I don’t want to be in the hotel business that’s for sure. I’ve also learned there's a reason why I need to push myself to be better. There are a lot of people I see at work that are totally miserable and it’s their career. I would never want that to be miserable my whole life, you only live once so might as well live it doing something you love to do.